Sunday, February 18, 2007

Remember When John McCain Was A Moderate?

Well, it's over. The pandering is complete, and now he's officially a Conservative Douchebag. I've never seen such a complete political turn and total selling-out of values.

He should be ashamed.

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that one guy you know, 9:58 PM | | | | | | | | | | link | 2 comments |

Friday, February 16, 2007

The Joy of Wii Knows No Bounds

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that one guy you know, 3:52 PM | | | | | | | | | | link | 0 comments |

Thursday, February 15, 2007

I Could Watch This All Day, Forever.

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that one guy you know, 8:16 PM | | | | | | | | | | link | 1 comments |

Saturday, February 10, 2007

This is What You Get When you Know Too Many People at The Onion

The Onion

Troop Gradually Withdraws

BAGHDAD—According to members of his squad, 22-year-old Army Pfc. Casey Schreiner, who has been stationed in Iraq's Sunni Triangle for nearly...

that one guy you know, 1:04 PM | | | | | | | | | | link | 3 comments |

Monday, February 05, 2007

I Called It.

That "bride freaking out about her hair video," which I hated immediately and thought it was a fake the minute I saw it, is totally a viral ad campaign for shampoo.

Boosh.

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that one guy you know, 10:40 AM | | | | | | | | | | link | 0 comments |

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Attack of the Show on 'Aqua-Gate'

My show is cool. And once in a while, we even get to be smart.

that one guy you know, 11:35 PM | | | | | | | | | | link | 0 comments |

Who's The Winner?

If you want to see an exquisite example of what you get when you mix a Presidentially-sanctioned Culture of Fear and a completely irresponsible, hysterical media, then you need look no further than the "Aqua Gate" in Boston.

For those who missed out on this story, or are, for some reason, living under a rock, the short version is this: Adult Swim hired a guerrilla marketing company to promote Aqua Teen Hunger Force by placing LED boards of their Mooninite characters around cities across the country.

Three weeks go by without anything happening. Some cities find the boards up and just remove them. Then Boston finds some and goes absolutely ape-shit, effectively shutting down the entire city because they thought they were bombs. The media whips itself into an orgiastic frenzy, calling the devices - which clearly are Lite Brite boards - things like bombs, improvised explosive devices, terror tools, etc.

Of course, as soon as they actually show one of these "bombs," any one of the millions of people who watch the show - or are vaguely aware of the series (like, say, from one of their nationwide ad campaigns) - immediately recognized this is a marketing stunt.

Now, I don't fault the Boston Police for this. If a police department gets a phone call claiming a suspicious looking device is mounted on a bridge, then yes - they should go check it out immediately. When they figure out that it's not dangerous - which I imagine the Boston Police Department did pretty quickly - then they should give the all-clear and go about taking down the other devices quietly, like departments across the country did for the past three weeks.

Unfortunately, the media got involved. And, as you know, when the whiff of terrorism is in the air - as it has been for 6 years now - all common sense is thrown out the window. Thus, we had Fox News claiming the city was under a terror attack and local news outlets going into exquisitely detailed speculation as the bomb squad 'exploded' the non-exploding devices.

Even after it was clear there was no danger, the media continues to use the language of terror. The New York Post still refers to the items as "bombs," an ill-informed columnist paints the duo as unemployed stoner miscreants (as are, he implies, anyone who likes 'Aqua Teen.' Darn those kids with their ironic postmodern pop-culture shows and their rock music!), and the local ABC affiliate even claimed my place of employment - G4 - was involved in a co-marketing campaign. Do you think anyone called us to ask?

Nope.

That's the media. Jumping to conclusions, not asking questions, and trying desperately and feverishly to one-up each other by sensationalizing non-stories.

But who's to blame for the brou-ha-ha? The police, for overracting and shutting down the city? The media, for half-reporting a story and then continuing to amplify it? Whoever first thought the thing was a bomb?

Well, now that everyone in the country was watching, The City of Boston - enraged that it had to shut itself down for a day to deal with a marketing campaign - arrested two local guys who had mounted the devices across the city. As the Fear Machine had done such a good job of getting everyone scared shitless over Lite Brites (taking a break from the usual things like trans-fats, elementary school air ventilation systems, and life in general), it figured it'd continue by accusing the two guys of intentionally trying to cause fear and panic.

'Cause, you know, that's how advertising works. Remember that old "Drink Coke or We'll Kill You!" campaign?

City Officials were deplorable. Instead of admitting they overreacted, they went on the attack. Mayor Menino dug up the ol' 9/11 wardrum, saying "It is outrageous, in a post 9/11 world, that a company would use this type of marketing scheme." The state's Attorney General defended the response, saying "It had a very sinister appearance ... it had a battery behind it, and wires."

Well, so does a Teddy Ruxpin. And the advertising company didn't put fake bombs around the city. Boston just assumed they were bombs.

The two were charged with 'Planting a Hoax Device,' which will most likely get dropped. The ad company's intent was not to shut down a city, and no prosecutor will ever be able to prove that in a court.

And the guys know it.

They were released on bail this morning, and held a press conference where they agreed only to answer questions about hair and hairstyles. Which, in my opinion, is not only hilarious, but is incredible ballsy. Here's a clip from venerable journalistic institution Fox News. Note that we are still on ALERT:



If this whole ordeal shows us anything (I mean, besides the fact that the media, on the whole, is horribly irresponsible), it's that when you create a society that's default setting is PANIC!, this is what happens. You could leave a piece of plastic hanging in a city and completely shut it down for almost an entire day. At that point, do the terrorists even have to try?

And if they did try, would it take us three weeks to notice?

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that one guy you know, 10:17 AM | | | | | | | | | | link | 4 comments |